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"Whatever I Am, You Made Me"
Season 5, Episode 3
Vampire Tara 5x3.png
Air date June 24, 2012
Written by Raelle Tucker
Directed by David Petrarca
Episode Guide
"Authority Always Wins"
"We’ll Meet Again"

"Whatever I Am, You Made Me" is the third episode of Season 5 of the HBO original series True Blood, and the series' fifty-first episode overall.

Summary[edit | edit source]

Bill and Eric barter for their lives with the Authority Chancellors and their leader, Roman. Salome and Roman enlist a new ally in the face of Russell’s return. Sookie goes to Fangtasia to ask for help from Pam, who is still caught up in her memories of Eric and the strange murders at the Comstock Brothel. Andy’s dalliance with Holly comes back to bite him in the butt; later, he’s visited by Gordon Pelt and Barbara Pelt, who are searching for Debbie. Jason bumps into an old high school teacher, but their reunion brings up conflicting feelings.

Synopsis[edit | edit source]

"Suffering does not kill the appetite for power,
it exacerbates it."
― Roman Zimojic

Tara stands in the middle of the woods, confused and amazed at her new-found heightened senses. As her wounds heal before her eyes, she senses the heartbeat of animals nearby and clearly sees the skies beyond what the human eye can. Lafayette and Sookie appear, yelling for her. Tara runs off before they can see her and stops when she sees a girl (Lindsey) trying to fix the flat tire of her car. Tara attacks the girl, slamming her against the hood of the vehicle. Her victim begs for her life. Tara then sees her reflection on the windshield and stops herself. She apologizes and runs off.

Steve Newlin is now the public face of the Authority.

The Authority continues to debate what to do with Bill and Eric for leaving Russell alive. Roman assures them that he will take their opinions under advisement and sends them away, except Salome. Roman reveals to Eric and Bill that Russell has become a "poster boy" for Sanguinistas for what he did on public television. Roman makes it clear to them that he will not see mainstreaming ruined by one ancient, pissed off psychopath. Bill and Eric assure him that they understand and promise to bring Russell in or die trying. After sending them away, Roman calls in for the "new Nan Flanagan", revealing it to be Reverend Steve Newlin.

Sookie goes to Fangtasia, begging Pam to help her to find Tara. Pam shows disinterest and threatens to kill Sookie if she does not leave the bar. Sookie refuses and Pam pushes her against a table with her super strength. Sookie retaliates using her powers to knock Pam off her feet and walks away.

Sam takes a crate of empty beer bottles out of Merlotte's and runs into Tara. She is crying blood, revealing to Sam her new vampire nature. Sam asks what happened to her; Tara simply states that she's hungry.

Roman explains to Steve that Nan told the world that Russell was dead, and that they have just learned that the announcement was a lie. Steve says that there is no proof and that people will believe anything they want to because of their irrationality and motivation to live in fear. Steve tells Roman that he'll make the world believe whatever they want. Roman finds Steve's words insulting, reminding him that humans birthed them before they became vampires, which makes them their ancestors. Roman elucidates that if vampires continue to act like savages, humanity will rise up with their armies and attack them. Roman explains that if Russell pops up on television again, threatening to eat children, then he will need a friendly vampire mainstreamer who knows how to work a crowd. Steve assures that he will not let him down. Roman caresses his face then sends him away. He instructs Salome to ensure that Bill and Eric are thoroughly scanned to avoid a repeat of the "necromantic bullshit" Marnie did the year before.

Bill and Eric wearing iStakes.

Molly, a bubbly vampire, requests for Bill and Eric to remove their shirts and places a device on them called the iStake. It is firmly strapped around their torsos and centered over their hearts. Molly tells them that the indestructible devices will pierce their heart faster than a bullet with the click of an application on her iPhone. She warns that attempting to remove the iStake will also trigger it.

Lafayette returns to Sookie's house and tells her that he looked everywhere for Tara. He checked Merlotte's, which was closed, and checked at Tara's mother Lettie Mae's house without revealing that Tara had become a vampire. Sookie hopes that Tara has the sense to find somewhere safe to sleep before sunrise.

Tara lines up empty bottles of Tru Blood on the bar of Merlotte's, demanding more from Sam. Sam attempts to call Lafayette and Sookie, but Tara refuses to allow him. Tara then passes out and Sam immediately realizes that the sun is rising and quickly tries to find a place to hide her.

Andy learns of his embarrassing photo put on Facebook.

Andy arrives at the Sheriff’s office. Rosie mocks him because a picture of his night with Holly has been posted by Holly's kids on their Facebook profiles, labeling him as "Sheriff Mom Fucker." Furious, Andy demands they get back to work. He turns his anger on the newly arrived Gordon and Barbara Pelt, Debbie's parents. He apologizes and then explains that they have found Debbie's abandoned car. Jason is grocery shopping and runs into his old high school teacher, Miss Steeler. Awkwardly surprised, they reminisce, with her revealing she was recently divorced and moved back to Bon Temps from Indiana. Jason suggestively reminds her that he remembers everything she taught him. Embarrassed, Miss Steeler attempts to leave, but Jason stops her.

Terry finds Arlene in the kitchen at Merlotte's. She attempts to get him to tell her what was going on. Terry only tells her that he needs to go away for a while and doesn't know when he would be back. She says that she will not be waiting for him. Terry leaves, and Arlene runs crying to the bathroom. Lafayette and Sookie arrive and Sookie asks Sam if he has seen Tara. He lies, but she reads his mind and discovers that he has put her in the walk-in freezer. Sam freaks out at Sookie for her involvement in Tara becoming a vampire. Sookie tells him that she was going to die if she didn't do something about it. Sam tells Sookie that his brother died in his arms and wonders if he should have fought for him. From his perspective, he says Sookie gave Tara a second chance, and it's up to Tara in what she wants to do with it. With Tara in the freezer, Sookie tells Lafayette that they have to spend the day at work ensuring that no one walks in there and learns about her.

Pam pays her debt to Eric.

In her coffin, Pam dreams of Eric visiting her brothel, Comstock Brothel. She attempts to sell one of the girls to him but Eric admits that he came to see her. While Pam kindly denies putting herself above her working girls, Eric says that everyone has a price, including her. In one of the rooms, Lorena and Bill are shown feeding on one of Pam's girls. Eric walks in and stops them both. Bill attempts to stake Eric and Eric easily stops him. Amused, Eric introduces himself. Bill once again attempts to attack Eric, but Lorena stops him. Lorena pleads with Eric that Bill is still new and does not understand his vampire lifestyle yet. Eric notes Bill's bravery and loyalty to Lorena, as well as his surprising strength for a newborn. Eric also mentioned that killing a newborn that shows such promise would be a shame simply because his Maker did not teach him to respect elder vampires. Eric demands that Lorena apologize to Pam. Pam extorts five hundred dollars for each girl they drained. Bill rushes out and Eric warns Lorena to control him. Lorena follows Bill and Pam pays her debt by sleeping with Eric. Pam is shown back in her coffin in the present day, still sleeping as bloody tears begin to fall.

Jason joins Miss Steeler at her house for a cup of tea. While they continue reminiscing, Jason tells her that what they had in high school was amazing. She tells him it was wrong, says that it was a mistake and apologizes to him. Jason says that he isn't sorry and that what they had was no mistake. Jason runs his hand between her thighs and kisses her neck and she quickly submits.

Debbie's parents find Alcide at work to ask him about Debbie's whereabouts, and if he was involved in her disappearance. Alcide says that he doesn't know where she went since he abjured her. He explains that Debbie was back on V and cheated on him with his packmaster. Alcide says that Debbie is probably with some vampire. Her parents reveal that her car was found abandoned with her purse and all of her money inside. They say that they're at the Sunshine Inn if he learns anything of her whereabouts.

Andy questions Sookie about Debbie's disappearance.

Andy questions Sookie about Debbie's location while she is working. Sookie tells him that she and Debbie never got along due to her friendship with Alcide. She maintains that while she didn't like Debbie, she doesn't know where she is. During the questioning, a paranoid Lafayette is watching and drinking by the bar. Andy lets Sookie walk and requests to speak to Holly outside. Lafayette tells Sookie they're screwed and that they're going to jail, but Sookie remains the stronger of the two and tells Lafayette to hold it together. Lafayette agrees and yells at Arlene about cold food left behind his serving counter. While Sookie pours a cup of coffee, she is seen trembling in fear. Outside the bar, Andy shows Holly a picture of Debbie and asks if she knew her. Holly says that she didn't. Andy then shows her the picture that her kids, Wade and Rocky posted on Facebook. Holly freaks out and assures him that they will be punished. Andy tells her not to worry about it and asks if she wants to take their relationship to the next level. Holly agrees.

Jason has an epiphany.

Jason and Miss Steeler lie naked on the floor of her house. Satisfied, Miss Steeler happily offers Jason wine. Jason, however, realizes that what they did in high school was indeed a mistake. Jason grabs his clothes and leaves.

Salome has Bill brought down to the Authority's basement. As they walk, Salome asks Bill if he knows who she is. Bill reveals what little details he knows, but Salome warns him not to believe everything in the Bible. Salome revealed that the Bible made her a convenient villain and a symbol for the dangers of female sexuality, but in actuality she was merely a girl with a troubled family. Bill then asked if she actually did ask for a man's head on a silver platter, and she said it was only politics. She further revealed that John the Baptist denounced her mother's re-marriage to her uncle, the King. Wanting him silenced, she took advantage of her new husband's fondness for teenage virgins and traded Salome's body for revenge. Bill then asked about the dance of the Seven Veils, and Salome said she was wrapped in sheer scarves when she was delivered to her uncle's bed where the supposed 'dance' began. Salome then reveals that she has been following Bill's upsurge for centuries and admires that he continues following his heart, something that vampires rarely do. Salome reveals that she wants to help him. When Bill asks why, Salome admits that something about Bill moves her, and that after two thousand years, she has learned to trust that feeling. When she asks Bill if she can trust him, Bill asks how he can prove it when she already has his life in her hands. She said perhaps by letting him take her life with his. Bill then pins her against the wall and has sex with her.

Salome has sex with Bill.

Jessica shops for clothes at Tracy's Togs. Tracy assures her that if she is trying to get Jason's attention then she needn't work so hard. Jessica immediately defends Jason, warning Tracy that if she wants her to continue spending money there, she will hold her tongue regarding Jessica's friends. A man walks in with a receipt. Jessica immediately reacts to his delightful scent and chases after him. He hurries to his car and drives off. Jessica tracks him to find the vehicle abandoned. Jessica yells that she can still smell him.

Hoyt walks in to Fangtasia wearing eyeliner and Goth clothes. Pam tells him that the look will surely get him eaten alive. Hoyt counters that is what he's hoping for.

Pam forces Eric to turn her or watch her die.

In another flashback, Pam is shown in bed with Eric after she slept with him. She asks Eric what it is like to be a vampire. Eric says it would take several human lifetimes to answer that question. Pam asks Eric to make her a vampire, saying that they would have all the time in the world. Eric says that she doesn't know what she is asking for. She disagrees, asserting that she wants a life worth living. Pam tells Eric that women like her die alone when they get old, riddled with diseases. She says that if he knew what kind of life waited for her, he would turn her. Eric challenges that if she knew the responsibilities of being a Maker, she wouldn't dare ask. Pam asks him to make and then leave her, sure that she could take care of herself. Eric explains tossing a newborn baby into a gutter is no different to abandoning a newborn vampire. He adds that becoming a Maker is a bond deeper than any human can understand. Eric prepares to leave and Pam puts on her robes and walks to her table. She intentionally cuts both her forearms and begins to bleed profusely. She begs Eric to make her a vampire or watch her die of blood loss. Hesitant at first, Eric reveals his fangs and gives her what she wanted. Back in Fangtasia, Pam looks at Eric's chair with grief.

Salome offers her friendship to Eric.

Eric is brought to Salome's bedroom at her request. Salome reveals that she knows Nora is Eric's sister through Godric. She says that she found Godric to be a glorious vampire until he lost his way. Salome wonders why Eric left Nora to die; he answers that he had no choice. She tells Eric that we all have choices. Eric asks if this is how she makes friends. Salome says that friends she can trust are a rare commodity. She confides that she sponsored and mentored Nora; Eric wonders if she believes Nora's arrest reflects badly. Salome says Eric is cold at heart because he's been hurt. Eric asserts that it will heal. Salome says that she could quicken that process by being his friend, removing her robes and lying naked on her bed. Eric walks towards her.

Nora is tortured by Rosalyn regarding her relationship with Bill and Eric. Nora says nothing and Rosalyn threatens to kill them both. Nora then claims that she is a Sanguinista and that mainstreaming with humans is an abomination. Nora asserts that Lilith will rise from the blood and kill all the members of the Authority. Rosalyn is satisfied but sadistically continues torturing Nora.

Jessica visits Jason at home, still excited about the man she chased. Turned on by this, Jessica attempts to have sex with Jason. He rejects her after having had his epiphany. Jason realizes that he's not a piece of meat and refuses to try and fill the void in his heart with sex anymore. Jason says that he cannot be friends with girls because he immediately thinks of having sex with them first. He asks Jessica to leave. Instead, she instructs Jason to grab a beer while she puts on one of his sweats and then says that they will talk about what happened to him. She assures Jason that they can be friends, and he agrees.

Lafayette tries to give Tara a bottle of Tru Blood after she awakens in the Merlotte's freezer. Alcide pays Sookie a visit to ask about Debbie. Sookie immediately denies knowing anything and assures him that there is nothing going on. Tara throws Lafayette through the freezer door. Alcide, Sookie, Arlene, and Sam quickly go to check on him. Sookie pretends to be oblivious to what happened to Tara and asks why she was in the freezer. Tara tells Sookie not to play dumb. Tara reveals her fangs, frightening Arlene. Tara warns all of them to stay away from her or she'll kill them, quickly leaving through the back door. Alcide glares at Sookie, walking away.

Bill and Eric are seen in an elevator. Eric attempts to gloat about sleeping with Salome to Bill; Bill smiles, hinting at his own sexual encounter with Salome before Eric. Bill tells Eric that gentlemen shouldn't brag about sloppy seconds, and Eric wonders what she wants. When the elevator doors open, a group of guards are seen waiting for them.

File:S05E03 Salome and Roman.png

Roman and Salome

In Salome's bedroom, Roman asks her if she had fun. Salome reveals that neither Bill nor Eric are Sanguinistas and that they can be trusted. Roman says he's not sure that anyone can be trusted because Nora has confessed to being a Sanguinista. Salome suggests that they take a different route since mainstreaming has divided vampires. Roman says that's exactly what they want and refuses, convinced that mainstreaming is working. Salome says that she's afraid for Roman. Roman says she shouldn't be and with her as his secret weapon, there is nothing for her to worry about.

Lafayette sees his demon in the mirror.

At Merlotte's, Arlene shames Lafayette for allowing Tara to become a vampire while she waits for an order of gumbo. Lafayette screams at Arlene and yells for her to leave his kitchen. Lafayette then grabs a bottle of bleach and pours it into the gumbo. When Lafayette looks into a mirror, his face has shifted into that of Jesus' demon. Lafayette then realizes what he was doing, grabs the pot and upends it in the sink. He panics over what just happened.

Sookie explains to Alcide what happened to Debbie, revealing that she killed her because she shot Tara. Angry, Alcide questions if Sookie was planning on keeping it a secret from him. Sookie admits that she was because she knew he loved Debbie and didn't know what Alcide would do. Alcide yells at Sookie, angry that he has had her back since day one and yet she lied to his face. Sookie delicately asks him if he plans to tell anyone. Alcide says nothing and walks away.

Tara attempts suicide.

Tara is seen passing the "Curl Up and Fry" tanning salon in town. She breaks in and lies on a tanning bed. Turning it on, she screams as the ultraviolet rays burn her. In Fangtasia, while Pam is working in her office, she feels Tara's self-inflicted pain. Pam shakes her head, muttering, "You stupid bitch."

Trailer[edit | edit source]

Notes[edit | edit source]

Accolades[edit | edit source]

  • This episode currently hasn't received any awards.

Allusions[edit | edit source]

  • In this episode Jessica visits a shop called Tracy's Togs. In the books the owner of the store is Tara and it is called Tara's Togs; because Tara's storyline is completely different from the books the store owner had to be another person.

Bloopers and Continuity Errors[edit | edit source]

  • There are no bloopers that occur in this episode.

Continuity[edit | edit source]

Flashbacks[edit | edit source]

  • Pam has another flashback to San Francisco in 1905. Eric has come to her brothel, and he wants her, not any of her other girls. Later Eric and Pam encounter a very young and wild Bill Compton, along with Lorena, feeding on one of the girls. Bill wants a fight with Eric but Lorena quickly whisks him away before anything can happen. After having sex, Pam tells Eric she wants him to make her a vampire. He refuses. However, Pam slashes her wrists, telling him that he must either make her a vampire like him or watch her die. He makes her a vampire.

Miscredits[edit | edit source]

  • There are no miscredits that occur in this episode.

Music[edit | edit source]

  • "Blood for Poppies" - Garbage (plays as Sookie visits Pam at the club to ask help for Tara. An argument ensues.)
  • "Piece of Heaven" - Susie Boehm (plays as Jessica lets Jason know they can be friends too.)
  • "Mopus Dopus" - Chili Karonkas & The Infidels (plays as Andy questions Sookie about Debbie Pelt's whereabouts.)
  • "I'm With You" - We Are Leo (plays as Jessica talks to the salesperson at the shop about Jason.)
  • "Transistor" - Black Mariah (plays as Hoyt shows up at Fangtasia and Pam teases him.)
  • "Get Lucky" - Troubadour Kings (plays as in the kitchen at Merlotte's.)
  • "Lonely" - Shaela Millers (plays as Lafayette puts a spell on Sookie's car.)
  • "Whatever I Am, You Made Me" - Koko Taylor (plays over the end credits.)

Production[edit | edit source]

  • There are no production notes available for this episode.

Title[edit | edit source]

  • There are no notes on the title based on this episode.

Trivia[edit | edit source]

  • There is currently no trivia associated with this episode.

Memorable Quotes[edit | edit source]

Eric Northman: "Lorena! You procreated! Oh, and he is protective."

Roman Zimojic:

  • "Reverend Newlin you have been a vampire now for, what, four months? And yet you find it funny to ridicule and underestimate the human race? The race that birthed all of us into existence? Is this some kind of joke?"
  • "Do you know the one thing more dangerous than a martyr? A 3,000 year old vampire who hasn't fed in over a year. Suffering doesn't kill the appetite for power, it exacerbates it. I have dedicated my guardianship to the fight for co-existence and I will not see it go swirling down the shitter because of one ancient pissed off psychopath."

Memorable Dialogue[edit | edit source]

Eric Northman: "So I had a visit this evening. From a certain... chancellor."
Bill Compton: "Interesting..."
Eric Northman: "What, you too?"
Bill Compton: "Well, you know what they say about gentlemen: they don't brag about sloppy seconds."
Eric Northman: "Oh... what the hell does she want from us?"
Bill Compton: "I have no idea. But something tells me she usually gets what she wants."

Sookie Stackhouse: "Pam, listen, asking you for help is about the last thing I want to do right now but Tara ran away. She's too fast, we can't catch her. She's out there somewhere—scared, hungry-"
Pamela Swynford de Beaufort: "We had a deal. I held up my end of it. You haven't done shit for me, Tinkberbell."

Sookie Stackhouse: "Can I give you a hug without you thinking about my boobs?"
Sam Merlotte: "Probably not."
Sookie Stackhouse: "Oh, what the hell. Go ahead."

Eric Northman: "Delightful, but it is you I came to see."
Pamela Swynford de Beaufort: "A good merchant doesn't compete with her merchandise, sir."
Eric Northman: "And a good customer knows everything has its price."

Eric Northman: "Becoming a Maker is an eternal commitment. Greater than any marriage, deeper than any human bond. To throw that away is sacrilege..."
Pamela Swynford de Beaufort: "An honorable vampire. Isn't that a contradiction?"
Eric Northman: "No more than an intelligent whore. Yet here we are."

Nora Gainesborough: "Yes, I believe vampires were made in God's image! I believe mainstreaming is an abomination! And I believe that Lilith will rise from the blood and rip your blasphemous fucking heads off, and dance in your muck!"
Rosalyn Harris: "Good girl. Now doesn't that make you feel better?"

Jessica Hamby: "I'm sorry, is there something wrong?"
Jason Stackhouse: "You know what? Yeah. I ain't some mechanical bull you can come and ride on whenever you feel like."
Jessica Hamby: "What the hell happened to you today?"
Jason Stackhouse: "Let's see... uh, well, I realized I got this big, fucking hole inside of me that I've been filling with sex and 'cause that's what I got taught to do. 'Cause I was too fucking young and it felt too fucking good and it made it all go away! But it ain't working no more... and I don't know how to deal with what I'm feeling."

Jessica Hamby: "We don't have to have sex. We could just talk, I... just wanna be your friend."
Jason Stackhouse: "See, the minute you do that my dick starts screaming, 'Dude, just shut up and fuck her.' I can't be friends with the girl, I don't know how!"
Jessica Hamby: "Yeah, you do. You already are. So I'm gonna go put on a pair of your sweats and you're gonna grab yourself a beer and you're gonna tell me what the hell happened today. Maybe I'll have some advice, maybe I'll just listen. See? It's that easy."

Cast[edit | edit source]

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Episode Ratings[edit | edit source]

Episode # Episode Title Viewers (in millions)
#5.03 (51) "Whatever I Am, You Made Me" 4.66

True Blood Season 5
<< Season 2<< Season 3<< Season 4Season 6 >>Season 7 >>
#01 "Turn! Turn! Turn!"#07 "In the Beginning"
#02 "Authority Always Wins"#08 "Somebody That I Used to Know"
#03 "Whatever I Am, You Made Me"#09 "Everybody Wants to Rule the World"
#04 "We’ll Meet Again"#10 "Gone, Gone, Gone"
#05 "Let's Boot and Rally"#11 "Sunset"
#06 "Hopeless"#12 "Save Yourself"
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